Morning, morning thoughts

“I think therefore, I am.”

I woke this morning, and I was in complete bliss, my life was perfect; then I really woke up, and my day started.

I know this is not a new thought for everyone, but I really thank God, that I get to wake up, move my limbs, get in that shower and go to a job that let’s me do where my heart is and get paid doing it. 

I’m not one of those lucky ones though who get to travel, yet I know I’m lucky enough to be able to think what I want to do, and somehow find my way to it. I have determination in what I do, and conviction, and a lot of people don’t have that, I do though…

#sarapngbuhay

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Underrated & Overwhelmed 

i need to chill out.

Stressed out, spaced out, undeniable whirl of judgment and distress.

Fleeting feelings are underrated, thoughtless words unspoken,  forgotten sentences not finished, broken glass shattered to spill blood of a heart so pure in other’s thoughts.

Underrated, thoroughly berated. Broken bones, thrown by stones. Shattered confidence, naive by ignorance.   Wishful negligence, selective patience.

A heart thought pure, is a reason to hurt it.  A tainted heart known to have troubles is a reason to protect it.   A heart full of love is a reason to break it, A heart that does not love, needs to be understood.

life is life; it always changes, you need to adapt to it, if you don’t then you’re a milksop and dude, that’s namby-pamby.

Self what worth?

Every girl knows to be “pleasing”, all girls know how to be “nice”. It’s a switch so easy to turn on and off, it’s almost as easy as blinking.

Then there are these women who are little girls, who never grew up, who believe they were really meant to be princesses and marry their prince charming. These girls don’t know when to turn it off, they believe this how they should act all the time, and it really is embaressing for the other people to watch or in the worst case, accept them.

I love to work, I love breaking my back, and toughing it out. I like to strive for something and show I’m worth more than my mestiza looks.

I’m proud on who I have to be, rather than who I already am.

TRAINWRECK

FRIDAY, MAY 29, 2015

Trainwreck

On my tracks here I go,
look at me, no one stops me,
I run, I rail, I flow, I go.
The tracks run hard and deep,
something in me resonates a thousand blinks.
Something shouldn’t be so strong and hard,
it envelopes me and shudders my very core of being lively.
I am strong, I think,
I can resist, I think,
Yet my heart does a double beat,
skips a third, and does a double-back flip.
My shoulders shudder hard,
my back unhinges,
the crease that usually furrows is lost.
I secretly can’t stop smiling, I shouldn’t get lost.
I am unhinged, as hard and as strong a train on a railroad,
falling of the bridge, to the tracks of nowhere lead.

TOUGH LUCK FOR LIL’ OL’ ME

MONDAY, MAY 11, 2015

Tough Luck for Lil’ Ol’ Me

Deep does mind  go,

reflecting on what I was told.
Once I hear, I always keep,
all those words once thrown to me.
It could be good, it could be bad,
if I cared about you, then I’d listen,
if it meant something, then I’d fix it.
Intentions of your heart matter not to me,
I do with my thoughts, whatever I please.
My thoughts are my own, my body is everything that makes me be.
My skin holds me in, but my feelings over flow, from the tips of my toes,
to the locks of my hair, down to my very big butt below.
Reactions, distractions, forget that I’m here,
I am my own woman, I firmly believe that,
although I found my other half, I am completely me.
My heart is my soul, and my mind is my voice.
I love myself, all that is, and whatever I believe loves me.

PATH PLEASE

SATURDAY, JANUARY 31, 2015

Path Please

I don’t follow the road of my path,
I jump and dodge, and hold on for my right,
the funny thing about flight, is it’s easy to jump off anytime.
Walk, run, skip, and hop, forget it, you know what? I think I’ll stop.
I’ve ran before I started to walk, now hold on tight! Lean on light.
I forgot how it is, to be mean and cruel,
Something I wish I never used as a tool.
Being how I am is different you see,
I love to laugh and giggle, be silly.
I’m honest and free,
I don’t judge, I don’t sneer,
I don’t let negativity break me, nor break my vibe,
all you gotta do is breathe and take a while.
Give in, get lost,
hold someone tight,
no arms, but eyes,
no flesh, but love.
Open and receive.
Yes Please.

SENSEIS.

SATURDAY, JANUARY 10, 2015

Senseis.

Clean and Cook, Smile and laugh
Create and learn, Follow and sieze.
Sides or ups, flows or dams,
give and plate, forget a mistake.
Fly high, swim deep,
forget the winds.
See no height,
touch no fall,
fleeting brows,
eyes alight,
crinkling smile,
look up alive!
Wrinkle of nose,
fight the flight,
run the wave,
forget the path,
there is no stone!
Light at night,
dark at day,
life is lived,
throughout a Knife.

ADRIFT.

SATURDAY, JANUARY 3, 2015

Adrift.

All in all, is all I am.
It is what it is.

No way to fight, no way to break free,

this unrelenting struggle of aiming to please.
Delight in this forever stumble, clumsily holding onto a tree.
Climbing high, climbing fast, the diversity of inside me.

A child, a daughter, a girlfriend, a worker, a friend, a confidante, nowhere to go but up or down, side to side, I can’t abide.

Drenched in this time of labels, purity and honesty may be the only key.
No way to hold on, no way to let go, this might be the only way to pour out my soul.

Soul clap may be the judgement in which my destiny let’s me roam free.

Soul path is the only causeway of the internal battle of who I am and who I hope to be.
Give humans a reason, give time a place, and give everyone a soul clap either way.

I need my soul clapped.

ORBS APART

FRIDAY, JANUARY 2, 2015

Orbs Apart

No need to be,
No need to do.

I am me, you are you.

My thoughts are not yours,
your thoughts are not mine,

We share this marvelous and yet insignificant ever changing and yet chasing these ideas of random constellations and natural orders of techniques.

Society of orbs apart.

Forever receding and inflating,
forever decreasing with additions.
Addictions, temptations, diversity of extremity and fancy.
Physical, mental, spiritual, soulful, flesh.

You and I roam free, in this never-ending schmaltzy dance of dips and turns.

It’s the following through is just beyond me.